I think of someone tall, with broad shoulders, a smile that lights up their eyes. Some salt and pepper hair, somebody who hugs with all their heart.
I also think of how they pamper me when I am low, how comfortable they are with my silence. I feel how I might feel in their arms when nothing feels right in the world.
I think of how the next morning dawns bright and chirpy and warm. With us snuggled together. Of how he might peck me on the neck and wake me. Of how my morning breath won’t deter him. Of how his length against me will ignite something in my belly.
But all this, this is what I think.
This is what I need from him.
Maybe he needs different things.
Maybe he needs to be loved differently.
Maybe he deserves more.
Maybe we deserve better than what we can imagine.